My sister is the baby of the family. She has lived in a government subsidized house for the past two years. Before that she lived in my parent's basement. Before that she had a house and a full time job and was able to pay her bills because she also watched my youngest two kids, which I paid her for, like a real daycare situation. Except that she was able to keep her two kids with her also. Ok, getting off topic and that's the other story.
Anyway, she has to hand the keys over for her house on Monday at noon. I know that it's a sucky time to try and find a place to live. She has three kids now. And no real man in the picture. Her first to kids are hers with her ex-husband and he's a dead beat. He's something like $7,000 behind in child support but since he makes a payment every other month the state of Indiana won't go after him.
Daddy of baby number three is a dead beat. And by dead beat I mean, he has worked a total of four months in the three and a half years that I've been in Texas. He is 27 or 28 and still lives with his mom. Shares a room with is brother/nephew. That right there should tell you something of his family dynamics.
My sister had broke up with him or had him break up with her about 20 times in the last two years. I'm not even kidding~I quit counting after about 12 times. She even had a restraining order on him at one point. But, he's back in the picture which means no one in the family wants to help her out because helping her means helping him. As soon as she gets a new place he would move in. Whether she thinks it or not. He's stolen from my family, both things and money. He's stolen straight out of my sisters purse and she's ok with that.
She told me on the phone two days ago that there is absolutely NO WAY that she would ever even consider moving back in with my parents. She isn't even talking to them. Her and my mom work at the same grocery store. My parents help her out more that she's willing to admit. She gets food stamps every month yet every month my mom lets her come in and grocery shop and then pays for the groceries because what my sister was getting with her food stamps won't last a full month. Her dead beat baby daddy eats like a horse. I'm not kidding. If she makes something before she goes to work for the kids to eat for dinner she doesn't expect to eat any when she gets home because big boy has eaten the rest. So, she's the one out there working, taking care of her three kids. He comes over to watch the kids when she's at work, because, seriously, what else does he have to do?
This loser is the choice she has made. And because she chose him she's lost a whole load of things. In no certain order, her house, her van, another van, and apartment, another car. And besides the physical 'things' she also lost her friends. She is civil to the people she works with. And she might have a friend or two outside of work, but they are HIS sisters, of the girlfriends/wives of his brothers. Not her friends, not her choice. Just people put together.
Anyway, again, my sister is expecting someone to swoop in and rescue her. She thinks that over the next two to three days someone is just going to jump in a fix her life. She's taking some steps to make sure the kids have a roof over their heads but has resigned herself to sleeping in her van (which my parent's bought straight out for her). I just don't understand the mentality. I don't get it.
When did we get like this? When did it turn ok for you to hate your parents for wanting you to get more out of life? She's ticked at me because I have a house sitting empty in the same city she lives in and I won't let her move in there. The house is on the market and we aren't renting it anymore. Plus I know HE would move in there with her. I've offered to let her come down here and move in with me here. She won't even consider that.
My grandma has a rental and I've tried to talk to my sister about that but she is completely done listening to me I guess. I'm not sure? She's hung up on me the last two times I've talked to her so I guess she's just writing me off now too. Guess she's done?
She has talked to her boyfriends mother and tried to make arrangements to have her kids sleep in the house while she sleeps outside in the van. I just don't understand how that makes sense? Her kids are two, four, and eight. Who is going to deal with them when they wake up in the night if she's outside sleeping in her van? Did I mention that it's a three bedroom house with five people living in it already? I don't even want my mind to go there. Too many bad things come from that house. Mom and step dad share a bedroom. Boyfriend shares a room with one brother/nephew, and the other brother/nephew has the other bedroom. I'm not sure which of the two brother/nephew's got expelled from school for selling drugs-the 15yo. The other one is 19 and had to do community service. Like I said, not a lot of good comes out of that house.
I have to get a shower. Ugh, I don't know how to deal with this drama anymore...
No comments:
Post a Comment